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Maxson Jarecki

@bucketcannon

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⬇️ Should We Get Married? with Maxson and Emily

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Yes we are available for parties by @bucketcannon

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a month ago

After months of discussions with friends, family, strangers, and experts, Maxson and Emily have made a decision. And, we are announcing it in our final episode!

To all of you who have been a part of our journey, thank you. We are so grateful and happy. by @bucketcannon

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5 months ago

We talk to Rob Schuham, a friend and author, about how he gave up 90% of his net worth to his ex-wife in his divorce more than 20 years ago. He walks us through the arc of his relationship, explaining how he ignored tensions early on while convincing himself that living together, getting engaged, and then getting married would somehow resolve deeper incompatibilities. After this emotional and financial journey, Rob spent decades firmly against ever getting married again but, now, he is warming up to it provided the relationship is grounded in love, reality, and a prenuptial agreement. At the end of the episode, Maxson and Emily talk about if we want a prenup, and if we are in love with the real, current versions of ourselves - or a projection of who we hope the other person will evolve into. by @bucketcannon

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5 months ago

Episode 13 is out! We talk to Rabbi Ben Spratt, Emily’s childhood rabbi, about marriage from a spiritual lens and if and how that appeals to us. We learned his view that friction in a marriage isn’t bad - it’s the very stimulus that causes us to grow into the people we are meant to be. We also learn about some Epic Jewish Stuff like Onah, the ancient stipulation that a man has an obligation to sexually pleasure his wife, and the weekly frequency is determined by his job. Listen to Should We Get Married? wherever you get podcasts! by @bucketcannon

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5 months ago

"Straight up, no." That's Archie's answer when we asked him if parents should stay together for the sake of the kids. He was four when his parents divorced, and we interviewed his mom Isabel about it back in Episode 4.⁣
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His take: no good marriage ever ends in divorce. If people need to separate, they should, and how you do it matters way more than if you do it. He thinks his parents did it great.⁣
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He's an amazing open book in this interview, and he also tells us the one question we should ask ourselves before getting married: would we be nice to each other on the way out?⁣
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Episode 12 of @shouldwegetmarried is out today, anywhere you listen to podcasts! by @bucketcannon

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6 months ago

Hey friends! We’re launching this dedicated @shouldwegetmarried account with the release of Episode 11: where Maxson and Emily get fake married, complete with vows, to see what it might feel like to get actually married, under the guidance of professional wedding officiant Nico Raineau (@romcomweddings).

It was fascinating, powerful, and possibly the first time anyone has ever done this? Let us know if you’ve heard of a couple “trying on the pants of marriage” in this way. We’d love to hear from you.

Another thing - listeners have requested videos for each episode, so last week’s episode with Rhaina and this week’s episode are video eps. Check us out on Spotify and YouTube if you wanna watch our trial wedding ceremony, and anything on video going forward. Audio is still available there and everywhere else. by @bucketcannon

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6 months ago

Episode 10 of Should We Get Married? with Maxson and Emily is out today! We talk to Rhaina Cohen, author of The Other Significant Others, about the importance of “platonic life partners” - friends that you love with a depth and domesticity that mirrors romantic partnership. She tells us how she and her husband structured their life to include communal living with other couples, and her advice to anyone considering marriage: to stop worrying about convention, and figure out what you actually want together. At the end of the episode, Maxson and Emily try to figure out what actually makes the two of them more than just really, really good friends? by @bucketcannon

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6 months ago

In this week’s episode of Should We Get Married? Emily and I talk to Nico Raineau, a professional wedding officiant, who takes notes on our love story as he prepares a mock wedding ceremony for us. We learn about the unusual world of wedding officiants, we describe our weird and distinctly un-vibey first date, a surprise kiss in the rare books section of a bookstore, and the first big moment where we had to really assess our relationship. At the end of the episode, Emily and I muse on if going through a fake ceremony might make us feel closer, or further, from wanting to get legally married. by @bucketcannon

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7 months ago

Hey friends! On this episode of Should We Get Married? we talk to John J. Lennon, a self-taught writer who has been incarcerated at Sing Sing Prison for 24 years. John has been married twice to women he fell in love with through handwritten letters. He tells us what conjugal visits are like, who gets access to them, and their surprising origin. At the end of the episode, Maxson and Emily ask each other if they’d stay in a relationship if one of them went to prison. by @bucketcannon

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7 months ago

Emily and I have a podcast called Should We Get Married, and we just released Episode 6 which is an interview with our very own couples therapist, Karen Gordon. In it we talk about our conflict patterns, issues we’ve dealt with in the past, and the stuff we are going through together right now. This conversation really helped us in our quest to decide if we are going to get legally married, or stay dating forever! Check it out wherever you find podcasts which for me is on Spotify, but for you could be anywhere else. by @bucketcannon

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7 months ago

Over the past year, Emily and I have been on a quest to figure out if we’re going to get legally married, or stay dating forever. So, naturally, we’re making a podcast about it and we launched the show on Valentine’s Day!!

In each episode we talk to someone who has special knowledge about marriage: a divorcee, an ER nurse, an accountant, a prenup lawyer, a polyamorous married couple, a 12-year-old with unmarried parents, and many others as we figure things out in our own relationship:

If Emily and I get married, will we actually save money on taxes?

Can she be blocked from visiting me in the emergency room if we aren’t married?

Will Emily and I be more motivated to work through our issues and stay together through hard times if we are legally married, compared to if we are just dating?

Will a prenup hurt or help our relationship?

At the end of our research and in our final episode (!!), we are going to actually decide: will we get married, or stay dating forever?

So, if you’re engagement-curious, a lifelong marriage skeptic, happily married, or simply hungry for honest conversations about modern love and partnership, we welcome you to join us in our quest.

A big thank you to our incredible producer Remoy Philip, @bigron and @melttheband for our theme song “Fake Romantic”, and the supremely talented @madeleinevoge for our show art, all our guests (past, present and future), and our friends and community who have been helping bring this project to life.

Search for “Should We Get Married? with Maxson and Emily” anywhere you get your podcasts. And let us know in the comments guests you think we should talk to, and questions you want us to investigate. And if you think we are WAY overthinking this…let us know that too. by @bucketcannon

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8 months ago

We love being siblings because we have a shared history and shared parents. It makes being in love easier and more fruitful, especially holidays. by @bucketcannon

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a year ago