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Bella Koh

@catslavery

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choose love, always.
@theslowhouse @theslowschool_ @slowstoriescircle

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Someone ever once said, “The richest soil for growth is cultivated when you are single.”

I understood I didn’t want to be searching for love in 2022 and I had wanted to be with myself first. Exploring a relationship with myself, a healthy relationship with myself.

This period was particularly crucial for my personal growth. Apart from all the books I was reading to heal and grow myself, I was finally, fully processing my past traumas and acknowledging them.

This is what #selfempowerment feels like. It lifts you with awareness, knowledge, wisdom and confidence. It reconnects you with yourself.

2022 was an intense year for me. I was going through a lot personally, and there would be mornings when I am up and I would be deep in my thoughts. It’s the same frustrating thoughts running through my head over and over without much resolution. The process felt like I was digging up much from my past, my weaknesses, habits and deeply reflecting on them. I guess one has got to dig deep enough to rediscover oneself.

The healing process for emotional abuse is brutal but it teaches you to be utterly honest with yourself.

And so I left Singapore in December, remembering being excited to be in a new environment, with my new found energy, plenty of love and an open heart that I brought along. That frequency I was vibing to made it one of our best trips ever! I am sure Alessandra would agree with me on that snow magic that brought smiles on our faces.

I was a kid once again, reconnecting with myself. A subtle yet immense joy that is truly priceless.

2023 will be magical, it already is.  🤍 ❄️🫶🏻

PS. Big love to @hyydnn @thelovestudios for taking time to photograph our small, but loving family taken on my birthday this year, 2 January 2023. Thank you for these wonderful memories you have given us each year. 🫶🏻

#slowlife #soloparenting #slowliving #healingjourney taken in Singapore by @catslavery

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4 years ago

2021 turned out to be a most fulfilling year.
Though the first half of it was insanely tough shit to deal with, it certainly taught me some of my biggest lessons in life.

Life is really what you make out of it. I don’t think there were any major alterations after my divorce, if any, my energy level felt like it was at an all-time high haha.
I could visibly see not just the change in myself, but the happiness exuding from my daughter.

That beautiful smile which I have never witnessed. It was a different smile, one that is filled with positivity, confidence, hope, love and affection. The healthy family dynamics formed with the inclusion of Tschumi, our loving puppy and my nurturing helper, was nothing but magical. After decades of chaotic and unsettling family life, I could finally hear myself breathe.

I was open to meeting new people (*ahems), while exposing myself to various sports and eventually discovering new communities.

Muay Thai, Brazilian jiu-jitsu , pole dancing, long-boarding, running, and the list does on. Sport changes you. It makes you whole, energetic and clearer in your focus. It builds a strong set of values in you. That made me remembered how much I enjoyed sports when I was a child. I used to be part of track and field (I loved sprinting 🤣), shot put, gymnastics, ballet, volleyball, badminton but that all came to a standstill when I got obsessed with design school and partying haha. My sports hall was zouk if dancing counts 😬

I’m grateful that I’m guiding myself back to the path I most love. Because every sport taught me a new skill and instilled powerful values in me.

My biggest takeaways for the year?
Control what’s within your ability.
What isn’t, let that go. There will always be people who have moral disengagements or think they are above the law. Don’t fight them. Use that energy you have gained and focus on things you truly love. That will make life utterly fulfilling.

#slowlife #slowliving #slowland #2022 #soloparent #divorce

📷 @hyydnn by @catslavery

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5 years ago

40, S I N G L E and being at peace with myself. I never thought I would embrace being 40 this wholeheartedly. Loving myself, finding myself, learning so much more about myself. There is a sweet kind of happiness coming from within, a relief, gladness and grace. I feel like I’m living life all over again and I am going to live this life with absolute honesty and compassion to myself, for myself.

My life hasn’t been easy for a couple of decades but I am super fortunate to be surrounded by incredible people who are constantly there for me. Supporting me, in case I fall hard. You know who you are.

Please be happy for me as I’m healing.
I’m learning what it is to be truly loved, to be taken care of, to be respected, to be acknowledged and to never be taken for granted.

I feel empowered to share this knowledge that I have gained, through a dreadful and long-suffering ordeal in my own life. I would want to share the lessons I have learned with everyone as my life progresses.
I certainly hope it will help overcome your own fears and insecurities in a way and become a stronger person in thought.

For now, my priorities will be Alessandra and making sure she is well. I would want to be her role model, teaching her the different family units that exist or can co-exist in our society. That, it is ok, it is normal.

I will teach her to embrace differences, to be kind, to be compassionate and to have empathy.

Happy birthday to me, from me. by @catslavery

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6 years ago

LIKE MOTHER. LIKE MANE.

Our thick, healthy hair didn’t happen by accident. It’s the result of small habits we’ve practised for years, from trusting the right hairdresser and washing from the roots to brushing gently, limiting heat, eating balanced meals, and finishing with a little SLOWHOUSE Hair Defrizzer.

Save this for your next wash day.
Or send it to your daughter. by @catslavery

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8 days ago

The older I get, the less interested I am in turning back time, and the more interested I am in caring well for the time I’m in. The now.

My face is changing. Its contours are softer, its volume has shifted, and some days the woman in the mirror looks a little different from the one I remember. I’m learning not to see these changes as something to hide, but as part of being.

So these days, my skincare is a quiet practice in paying attention. Avène DermAbsolu helps to resculpt facial contours and boosts collagen production by 2X. With Bakuchiol, a plant-based alternative to retinol that is gentler on sensitive skin, the four-product range is suitable for all skin types, even the most sensitive.

And at bedtime, Tschumi supervises everything. His facial contours, naturally, remain perfect.

Discover Avène DermAbsolu at @guardiansg!

@avene #AveneSG #DermAbsolu #ResculptsYourFacialContours #ad by @catslavery

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24 days ago

Yesterday morning, I was doing my usual rounds of morning wet marketing and stopped by my usual fish grocer. He and his mum have seen me pre-pregnancy, through having Allyboo, my divorce, and all the life transitions in between. And how odd that he said something so simple yesterday, but it made me feel so seen.

“All the best to you, ya. I know it’s not easy.”

Just such simple, literal words. But they meant so much.
I thanked him with love and grace, and wished the same for him and his business. Perhaps we don’t always know what someone has had to carry to get to where they are today. And sometimes, just being seen is enough.

So, what does it actually take to want a family? To have children? And what do families really need in order to thrive?

I hope this piece reframes a little of how we see children, motherhood and family, and how perhaps families can thrive in a slower way of living.

And to all mothers, fathers and carers, I hope you know I see you too. 💗

P.S. Crazy how I was initially hesitant to publish this piece. And then I got reminded by friends and followers who told me how much they enjoyed my recent writing and that it touched their hearts.

Maybe that was my reminder to just keep writing. 🙏🏼

Motherhood, through my eyes.

Motherhood, through my eyes.

Motherhood, through my eyes. by @catslavery

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2 months ago

Wow. Four months since I’ve posted here.
Honestly, I just haven’t felt like being online. I’ve been more interested in being here. Actually here, in my own life, not scrolling through everyone else’s. Slower mornings. Finding my bliss in the ordinary.

I think that’s what “slow living” really means, at least for me. It’s not about doing less or wanting less. It’s about actually noticing what’s already in front of you and being present in everything you do.

I hope you enjoy this little write-up on the Law of Bliss.
And tell me, what is your bliss?

P.S. To those who texted, checked in and noticed my absence online - thank you. It meant more than you know 🫶🏼 by @catslavery

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2 months ago

S L O W H O U S E
Home Gatherings return on 16 May, Saturday.

A slow little private gathering for friends, soul fam, curious readers, furapists, comforting food, meaningful conversations, and the simple joy of being together in a home again.

This round, we’re introducing our SLOW BOOKS TABLE.

Bring along a book you’ve loved. 📖
A children’s book, poetry collection, cookbook, novel, or a title that stayed with you long after you finished it. Leave it on the table for others to discover quietly throughout the day.

And if another book happens to call out to you, bring it home.
A gentle exchange between grown-ups and little readers. No presentations. No pressure. Just stories travelling from one home to another.

On the menu this time:
Fish Maw Dashi Soup with somen or rice, homemade teas, ice lattes, nourishing desserts, organic brownies, vegan cacao ice cream, and a few more slow comforts made throughout the day.

Contentment will scent the home.
Empowerment will linger in the quieter corners.
Boss Allyboo will still be taking your orders while our resident furapists continue asking for head rubs and cuddles.

Keeping this one intimate and cosy for now.

DM for deets 🫶🏼 taken in Bukit Timah, Singapore by @catslavery

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5 months ago

Our very first SLOWHOUSE home gatherings, supported by dear friends, kind hands, and soul fam. We couldn’t have asked for more.
The dry laksa and chicken porridge were gone before noon, while our little helpers held the fort as mama fought her own little battle in the kitchen. Copious iced lattes made their rounds through the day, organic brownies were savoured slowly and delicately, and our lovingly made vegan cacao ice cream became an unexpected favourite during afternoon tea.

A massive pot of traditional almond soup, made entirely from scratch, was emptied before the evening rays even settled in.

Contentment quietly scented the dining space, while Empowerment filled the meditation room whenever guests needed a little respite. Our scents found new homes too.

The furapists gave and received endless love from both children and adults, and in many ways, those moments captured the true essence of gathering. One of warmth, connection, and slowing down time.
Like-minded souls met new ones. Conversations lingered.

The children and furkids found one another effortlessly. And everyone left with far more than full bellies.

We’re already so excited to welcome everyone back again on 16 May, this Saturday. And if you’re keen to explore our scents, do reach out to us.

(I was so caught up in the kitchen that I barely managed to take more photos of everyone 😭) taken in Bukit Timah, Singapore by @catslavery

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5 months ago

NOTICE: THIS SESSION IS NOW RESERVED FOR FRIENDS AND FAMILIES ONLY. (Sadly, we had a complaint, haha. What happened to community building - sigh.)

We’re finally opening our doors to SLOWHOUSE Home Cafe! Honestly instigated by Allyboo! (She’ll be your server of the day!)

Come by for a bowl of something warm, a glass of something comforting, and for slow conversations.

From Teochew-style porridge to laksa with organic coconut milk, from almond soups to our beloved brownies, everything is made the way we like to live: slow, healthy, and wholesome.

Pets, kids, friends, all welcome.
See you!

1 May 2026, Friday
8am — 5pm
87B Linden Drive
Bukit Timah
(Kind reminder to only park along the outside of the driveway!) taken in Bukit Timah, Singapore by @catslavery

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6 months ago

This story was not written in a single moment, but gathered over years. Through loss, through love, through learning how to let go without losing what mattered.

If you’ve ever loved deeply, you will understand this.

Where Grief Meets Life
Short Stories #2 by SLOWHOUSE by @catslavery

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6 months ago

53 days of stadium life. Ran more than we ate.
@alesslavery by @catslavery

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6 months ago