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Kimberly Coyle

@kimberlyacoyle

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Writer+Writing Instructor. Writes at The Attentive Life on Substack. Visit my Writer’s Work Shoppe ⬇️

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September is the prelude to my favorite month, but what a beautiful prelude she was!

Late summer beach days, early fall football, my first short, slow run after 6 months of PT, teaching and tutoring, and a wedding dress presentation by my future daughter-in-law the details of which I have locked in my mind vault (sorry, Ethan!)

This month felt like a slow sail into a sunset. All glimmers and light✨ by @kimberlyacoyle

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12 days ago

It’s never too late to look back and reflect on the small moments that mattered in August.

This was a wild month with some big changes—my role at work grew into a full time position and a literary agent I admire agreed to represent me.

I signed both contracts on the same day, believing in faith that this autumn will be a season of both/and not either/or.

In between the seismic shifts, the bees and bunnies, sunsets and celebrations, and @mumfordandsons music kept me grounded in the moment.

Goodbye, August. I bless your bounty💕 by @kimberlyacoyle

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a month ago

July is the kind of month that never has me wishing to be anywhere else on the calendar (see also: October).

July is lush with laughter, sunshine, farm stand produce, and enough enjoyable social events that I begin to question my own introversion—momentarily😘

I got to host my kids and their friends for the Fourth, play photographer at a bridal shower, paint by number under the stars with a glass of prosecco, share my book at the Banned Book edition of the Anti-Book Club Book Club, and stalk the stars of a movie being filmed feet away from my office on campus (sadly no sightings of either Daniel Radcliffe or Jonathan Groff, but it wasn’t for a lack of trying!)

There are horrible, terrible, no good, very bad things happening in the world, so I’m clinging to every ounce of joy like it’s my lifeline. by @kimberlyacoyle

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2 months ago

Full house, full heart❤️🤍💙

If there’s one thing I’m grateful we invested time and energy in over the years, it’s cultivating a cozy, comfortable, happy home for our kids and their friends to come home to.

Adulting is hard. Home should be the softest place to land. by @kimberlyacoyle

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3 months ago

June was one big satisfying exhale.

Is it just me or is sunshine literally the equivalent of somatic therapy?

This month began with our 30th anniversary (seriously, how?!) We watched Father of the Bride on our first date 34 years ago, and I knew my guy was a keeper from the start.

Then off to Boston to visit Sophie for a weekend—the lobster rolls were top tier, the time with my newly-21 year old baby even better.

June was ordinary otherwise, but there’s so much joy in a life that fits just right.

This Goldilocks is soaking up every second because life is so lifey, and you never know when change may arrive.

Sending you all a sunbeam from NJ for July☀️ by @kimberlyacoyle

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3 months ago

May revived my joy, one second at a time.

May’s anthem: Joy by @raye 🎶

May’s aesthetic: Rainbow-brite 🌈

May’s artist date: An art show by none other than our favorite artist @dalerobertsencaustic (His art hangs in almost every room of my home. Also, we’re related. Friends and family discount, baby!)🎨

May’s awaited event: Ethan and Margaux are engaged!!!!! The anticipation, the big moment, and the aftershocks of joy have literally healed something in me. 💍

May’s aloha: Our one (and likely only) family vacation to Hawaii to celebrate our 30th anniversary. It exceeded my expectations in every way. Maui was a feast of images, embodiment, and new experiences for this writer. 🌺

May’s a-ha moment: There’s nothing like a family vacation to peel you to your core in the best way possible. I adore these people so much. May there be more, more, more! 💕

Pick one of the superlatives above and tell me about your best May moment✨ by @kimberlyacoyle

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4 months ago

It’s official!! 💍

Ethan and Margaux coming soon to a church near you💒

Margaux’s been a part of teamcoyle for years, but we’re so thrilled to finally call her our daughter💕 taken in Maui, Hawaii by @kimberlyacoyle

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5 months ago

April served up one second at a time🌷

This month was a tall glass of lemonade we made out of the lemons we were dealt this spring.

It was a little sweet-tart of a month filled with sunny celebrations and a side helping of uncertainty.

Just like life, a little tart always cuts the sweet💛

Did you peep my bestie’s Bridgerton costume party? It was iconic.

Here’s your nudge to do something that doesn’t compute when life gets hard—play dress up, stare at the moon and cry with moon joy, be amazed, go to the beach in off-season, sit in the sunshine, take a weird bathroom selfie, hold hope that all will be resolved, somersault in the grass, believe restoration is happening even when the evidence is stretched thin across the timeline.

Raising my half-full glass to you in May🍋

✨What would you add to the list? by @kimberlyacoyle

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5 months ago

March is for birthdays! 🎉

For visits with all three kids in fun locations(NYC, DC, SC!)

For a hand-illustrated, hand-stitched story arriving in the mail from Ethan and Margaux.

For a brunch in Brooklyn and drinks at Other Half with Rachel and our other halves.

For Mom’s Weekend with SoSo, where I once again realize at no time was I ever cut out for sorority life lol.

For an impromptu Journey concert where M rocked his air guitar like every other 14 year old boy trapped in a middle aged body🎸

March is for more time with Michael, my three loves, and chasing the sun all the way to Florida only to discover it was sunnier in my own backyard. 💕

What was memorable for YOU this March? by @kimberlyacoyle

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6 months ago

Last week, I got a massage for my ailing foot and the therapist told me quite a bit about his life unprompted.

As a general rule, I don’t like chit chat during a massage. Just work your magic and minister to my ailing body, please and thank you.

But more than I love silence, I love when people tell me about their lives without prompting because one of my life intentions is to be a non-anxious, safe presence for people and their stories.

Towards the end of the hour, he asked me what I do and without hesitation I said “I’m a writer.”

This is true, but very rarely the answer I lead with—usually I say I’m a tutor/teacher/instructor. I guess his story helped me tell the truth about mine.

When he asked me about my writing genre, I said I write non-fiction. Mostly in faith-based spaces. I don’t say that out loud very often because it’s complicated to say you’re a Christian these days without lots of qualifiers. but it felt good to be honest.

He said, well, I hope you’ve been praying over this foot. I laughed and said, I do sometimes—it sure needs it.

Then his hands hovered over my foot, and he grew so quiet and still that I lifted my head to look at him. After a long pause, he asked me if I wanted him to pray for me.

I’m usually wary of this with strangers, but he’d already ministered to my physical pain, so I said yes.

His prayer was so heartfelt and kind and soulful. I received it with my hand on my heart, holding his words for healing, for restoration, and for new beginnings close.

I thanked him and he said, “You can thank my Mama for that. That’s the result of a praying mother. She calls and prays with me every morning.”

As I walked to the car in less pain and significantly lighter than an hour earlier, I sent a blessing heavenward for his Mama. I hope it found her the way her prayers for her son somehow, inexplicably found me. by @kimberlyacoyle

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7 months ago

When I look at February from a wide lens perspective, it was a total dumpster fire. My penchant for doomscrolling did me zero favors.

But, the micro moments spent with people I love, making things with love, receiving early birthday gifts given in love, truly carried me.

I’m going to be insufferable in October when I go to the Harry Styles concert my bestie Gillian gifted me😅 Will we wear tulle or does Harry call for sequins? We shall see!

Gather up the good, dear ones. We need every last bit of beauty to beat back the doom.

What’s the best gift you gave OR received recently? by @kimberlyacoyle

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7 months ago

Yesterday, while waiting for (another) cortisone shot at the podiatrist’s office, I met Nancy.

I sat next to her and her work in progress--a pot holder in a lovely confection of soft colors.

Instead of scrolling on my phone (I’m trying to break this habit), I struck up a conversation with her.

We talked about my desire to learn how to knit (Nancy thinks I may have more luck with crochet).

We talked about embroidery (Nancy misses it, but her eyesight is too strained for tiny stitches).

And we talked about the meditative nature of handicrafts (Nancy agrees, it soothes the soul).

Her potholder reminded me of a reel I saw recently about a family who hosted a party for their 90 year old loved one. They filled a huge room with everything their loved one made for them over the years as a celebration.

Quilts, pillows, clothing and more lined the walls of the room—each one stitched with love.

Nancy told me that a few years ago she started to wonder if anyone actually wanted the hand knit gifts she gave them every Christmas.

So, instead of giving a sweater or scarf that might be received with mixed reviews, she created an alternative:

Every December she hosts a tea and luncheon for the women and girls in her family. She fills her entire dining room with everything she has knit throughout the year, and each guest gets to make three passes through the room and take what they most desire.

I asked her what she does if multiple people want the same item, and she pulled out her phone to show me five girls each holding a stuffed hedgehog.

“I make multiples!” she said. “This year’s hot item was the hedgehog. Last year, it was the emotional support duck. Before that it was a gnome.”

What a delight!

It was the most wholesome, sweet conversation I didn’t know I needed.

I often find myself wondering where all of our wise elders have gone. Where are the older women who can show us how to live and love well?

It turns out the Nancys of this world are out there in waiting rooms clacking their knitting needles, ready to chat if we put away our phones and take notice. by @kimberlyacoyle

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8 months ago