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Kimberly Coyle

@kimberlyacoyle

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Writer+Writing Instructor. Writes at The Attentive Life on Substack. Visit my Writer’s Work Shoppe ⬇️

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$240,000 wow.

I can’t put into words how much being VP of philanthropy has meant to me. The amount of effort everyone has poured into this event over the past several months is something I will seriously never forget.

I want to shout out the contestants who showed up each week to practice excited to be there, who tirelessly fundraised, and put in so much effort no matter how embarrassing the videos they had to make might be. We couldn’t have done it without them.

Another huge shout out to the BMOC directors and the girls on my committee who have been working since APRIL to make this the best BMOC ever!!!!!

And lastly, to every Zeta who showed up and showed out this fall. There is a reason we are highest fundraising chapter in the country and it is ALL OF YOU! Even though this position caused me more stress than anything I’ve ever done lol I’ve never been so grateful.

To making the 1 in 8, none in 8 ☺️😛💘

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Only got to drink out of a coconut once 🥥🥥

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Peep Clemsons best cheerleader

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I’d like to thank Great Smokies, Dolly Parton, and the 8 bears I saw for sponsoring this trip

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Remembering an evening in England
A cozy room,
surrounded by other creatives
A warm fire crackles
Candles are lit
Dark painted walls the color of plums,
reflecting the flickering light
Beautiful women,
each unique in their own lovely way
Listening

A calm, gentle voice,
reading words knit into poetry…
Words dancing, tears flowing,
hearts healing, and breaking
Strangers yet sisters gathered together,
Forming a strange yet beautiful bond

Oh to go back
To sit quiet
Listening
Being filled to overflowing,
with wonder and awe and gratitude

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2024 in Review: Group shot edition. These are the people that filled 2024 with joy and laughter.

(IG won’t let me tag everyone…)

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Been having lots of fun 😁

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Back-to-back dinner with good friends! Headed into the city for dinner and a show: #johnoliver and @sethmeyers live at the @beacontheatre. Even got a question answered during their Q&A. And had dinner and caught up with friends in Jersey the night before. @theresalee75 and I aren’t empty nesters yet, but we are living like it!

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A few weeks ago, a precious and beautiful soul said something to me that has forever changed me. She encouraged me to “just go and be with it.”

At first I wasn’t sure exactly what she meant, but I went back to my room and just sat with the sad and pain. I didn’t fight it, I just sat and felt and experienced the sad and unknown. And cried buckets of tears. And then after about 40 minutes, the sad seemed to “move through” and melt away. It was a strange feeling. The sad was still there (and always will be this side of heaven) but was greatly diminished…it wasn’t as large and imposing as it had been at the beginning. And the best part, there seemed to be more *space* inside of me…like I had cleaned house and cleared out clutter and chaos.

Don’t get me wrong, this is definitely not the first time I’ve ever sat and cried. But it is the first time I didn’t internally fight the pain, I just literally sat with it…as if the anguish was a friend. And it was such a different experience!

So. I am learning:

Be with the sad.
Be with the angry.
Be with the fear.
be with the confusion.
Be with the unknown.
Be with the hurt.
And also, be with the joy, the gratitude, the abundance.

Whatever *it* is, just be with it.

For some reason, whether it’s a conscious or unconscious thing, we seem to want to fight feelings.

But I’m learning: there is something about “just being with it” that changes us and our need to fight it…especially the yuck. It is a perspective shift for sure. And I imagine it takes practice and time before this becomes our natural go-to response.

But the beautiful thing is, in learning to “just be with it”, there seems to be this strange effect: the yuck just does not seem quite so big, and it seems to move on through a little more quickly…it seems to melt away a little more freely. And while it and or the situation at the root of the sad may still be there, there seems to be less internal conflict, more space inside, and the good seems to intensify.

And now I know: this is where we find more space, more healing, more peace, more beauty, more of God’s gracious goodness, and where we thrive and bloom.

Thank you, Monica, for your wise words.

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Sometimes in life we are given the opportunity and honor of going on a trip and we find ourselves being forever changed. We find doors inside ourselves that were once closed or maybe even locked tight being unlocked and opened wide and we discover new and beautiful things about ourselves. And others.

For me, this recently happened on a trip to England. It was a wild, crazy, beautiful, amazing, life-changing experience and my heart is full of gratitude. Gratitude for my husband who made the trip financially possible and his encouragement to go. For the people who helped keep the farm and garden going while I was gone. For those who covered me in prayer. For the beautiful reminder: “God will carry you.” For the amazing women who organized and implemented the retreat portion of this trip. For each of the incredible and beautiful women who said yes to a week of rest…for their bravery in traveling in spite of challenges and or limitations, and also their bravery and vulnerability in sharing their stories. For the friend and mentor who forever changed my life through her gentle words and who threw the door wide open and exposed me to poetry. For the new friend who took the time to stop and ask and then rearranged my travel plans coming back - in my newness to international travel, my trip and flight back home was a nightmare and she quickly and seamlessly got it all changed for me so that traveling back home was easy and pleasant. For the I love you’s and the I’m so proud of you’s. For the incredible beauty and diversity of God’s amazing creation. For the incredible kindness of complete strangers everywhere I went. For safety in new and unknown places. For learning that our history is literally stored in our bones and that I had the chance to *go home* to the place where my great grand parents were from and walk the same streets and shoreline that they once walked. For safety while traveling alone. For the crazy realization I am a creative soul through and through and this is good!…*this* is the way God knit me together and that me knowing and embracing and living this out every day of my life brings Him much honor and glory and even joy.

(continued in comments…)

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45 feels good! It feels like I was born to be this age. I threw myself a huge party then flew to London on my own to go to museums. That’s right. On my own!! Then I met kindred strangers at Paddington Station to travel to the Cotswolds to spend a week resting, eating amazing meals, journaling, reading prayers and poetry out loud, visiting some beautiful manors, cemeteries, and churches. To say I came alive surrounded by graves and tombs is creepy and true! So many saints and sinners.

This picture was taken at Klemscott Manor which was William Morris’s home. I learned a lot about functional beauty. And about accepting people for who they are!

I took a cane on this trip to navigate the uneven landscape, but I didn’t need it much. I was surrounded by people who helped me!

This was a milestone birthday not because of my age. There is no 45 merch.

This was a milestone because I have been through a lot and I wanted to mark this moment and celebrate it.

I did not think about disability once. ( ok, that’s a stretch.) I didn’t feel disabled!
I did not listen to any podcasts or audiobooks.
I did not talk enneagram with anyone.
I wasn’t in the wilderness of working from home trying to muster the energy and motivation to be productive!

It got quiet and clear as we meditated on scripture and read prayers out loud to each other in unison.

It was nice to talk lovely things all week. Beautiful lovely things!

It was as if I went to art and beauty summer camp.

You see a woman who is fully engaged with her life and at home in her body in this picture!

Work called and the emails and messages came, but I relaxed and celebrated!

Much love and thanks to @suddenjourneys @kimberlyacoyle @christiepurifoy

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