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Sahida Apsara (she/her)🍉

@sahida_apsara

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Poet • Singer • Educator
🎵Making music with my love @dubfx11
👶🏽Classes: @jigglejamlisbon
💿Pre-order 'Prayer For My Daughters' below⬇️

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I didn’t know anyone when I moved to this town, but I prayed to find my people. People like me who witness the dystopia, but who still fight to keep the joy, the vision, and the hope for a better future.

It can be isolating to feel affected by the state of the world while everyone around you moves through life as if it’s business as usual. Sometimes I even catch myself doing the same.

But deep down, it’s not business as usual. There’s a quiet anxiety in witnessing the depravity, greed, and corruption of governments, pushing wars for profit, while the rest of the world keeps its head in the sand. According to UNICEF, more than 64,000 children have been killed or injured in Gaza. 3.5 million children are malnourished in Sudan. So many children are lost to war, bombardment, and artificial famine.

When I see someone wearing a keffiyeh, I just want to hug them. In my head : “Thank God, you care. Thank God you exist. You give me hope. You make me feel less alone.”because I know what it represents.

Angela Davis says Palestine is the moral litmus test for the world: if you support Palestine, you support all liberation movements. you support human rights and justice everywhere.

@soumati_studio so grateful i picked up your 🍉business card in a little cafe. @lee.james.achour

@sibilpatri so excited when i saw your instagram feed, speaking up for🍉

Being visible leads you to your people🍉

Follow @sahida_apsara on @bandcamp to check out this song ‘Universal Mind’ ft @alaisclay produced by @dubfx11.

Drop a little comment if you my ppl 🍉🍉🍉 by @sahida_apsara

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17 hours ago

So honoured to be on this album! Literally every single track hits the right vibe from start to finish.🔥

“Black Sweetness” ft @wildgloriosa remix by @djvadim is OUT NOW Proudly released on DJ Vadim’s label King Dada Sounds.mixed and mastered by @echorek
Go run it up, add it to your playlists.

@reginaldomasmamodeiv @graziella_fullcircle @mikeylouswakeupboss @xlmad_kalymatic_sound_ @abbeyrizzle @kathrindeboer @rayjah45 @subtribemusic @wildgloriosa
@numacrewofficial by @sahida_apsara

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2 days ago

I was nervous before I shared my last post. I’m in a good place in my life, and I didn’t want to revisit that heavy feeling. I didn’t want to cause social discomfort in my community back home.

But then I thought: the impulse to protect ourselves from the discomfort of speaking the truth is the very thing that protects abusers and creates an environment where more abuse can happen. It’s the same with avoiding politics to keep things comfortable. That comfort only protects the systems of oppression that thrive on society’s ignorance.

So many of you sent dms and comments saying:

“It happened to me.”
“It was ignored by social services because I was a child and he was a minor.”
“It happened to me when I was 5.”
“It happened to me, but I couldn’t tell anyone.”

My love, my heart, my prayers for healing is with all of you💕

If I can make more parents aware of this, so that children aren’t left unsupervised, that matters to me. I know that at some point our children become teenagers and we can’t stop them from socializing, but we can at least start the conversation.

And when a child does report abuse, it should never be dismissed because it came from another minor.

I held back from sharing my story publicly for a long time to protect my parents, from what they may have internalized about not being able to protect me. But i’m sharing because chanelling my rage into words, comes from wanting to protect other children from ever going through this.

Too many people keep their heads in the sand because they live in a world where systemic harm doesn’t touch them or their children, so they don’t feel compelled to change the structures that hurt others. But ultimately it touches all of us because we are One🤍 by @sahida_apsara

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7 days ago

I’m sharing this post for the 10-year-old me, who stayed silent.

For everyone who has gone through something similar.

This past week has been hard for so many women. Every time cases like the Cornell 7 come up in main news feeds, it’s not just something trending for us.

For many women, it’s a retraumatization of what was never fully processed and acknowledged—this feeling of collective rage that needs to be felt by us, and that needs to be held and acknowledged by our men.

To contemplate how early exposure to porn and patriarchal cult subconsciously reinforce male entitlement, making boys take rejection as a personal offense or failure.

Every single one of my girlfriends has stories of rape, sexual harassment, coercion, groping. Every single one.

A dude stalking you for blocks.
Groping hands on a dancefloor.
A date that expected more from a kiss.

I’ve spent the last three decades understanding all the knock-on impacts of child rape on my psyche.

I’m grateful for the journey it took me through—meditation, yoga, daily communion with God, daily loving conversations with little Sahida, healing through poetry.

I feel this is the final piece:

To publicly name it.

To claim power back from a society that hides harm through taboos. That teaches boys it’s okay to feel entitled to their wives’ bodies, okay to hit if they trigger you enough.

To educate.

Most children are hurt by someone they know. Silence prolongs abuse.

Give your child the tools to come to you: the words, the permission, the certainty that she’ll be believed and never blamed.

It starts small. When they tells you about a fight with a friend, listen and validate first, before jumping in to make them see the other side. If they learn you believe them about the little things, they’ll trust you with the big ones.

I never want my daughters to feel like they can’t come to me if they get hurt, or that it’s somehow their fault for choosing bad company, being in the wrong place, or wearing the wrong thing.

Follow me @sahida_apsara @bandcamp for my song “My Body is Mine” to educate our little ones early abt consent and body autonomy.

#rape #cornell7 #childsexualabuse by @sahida_apsara

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11 days ago

Thank You @sunandbassofficial in sardenia Italy for the epic vibes with my love @dubfx11 .The healing sea, dancing for hours to bass music and connecting with beautiful friends def recharged my spirit. Back with our beautiful girls today and back to being fulltime mum and dad. Viva La Nonna for giving us this needed break to do what we love! Ps thnx jay for the videos and beautiful hangs🩷#sunandbass #djmarky #breakdnb #staminamc #eddicharperbeatbox by @sahida_apsara

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a month ago

If you are new here, welcome fam!💗 @maouclinique @gemmaweekes @soniathevegan @amorvegankitchen @claudiaselvamusic 💗 by @sahida_apsara

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2 months ago

I listened to a podcast episode @dejablue where she asked the guest about the soul’s contract.

I stitched fragments of his response.

To listen to the full episode, “From Chaos to Divinity,” YouTube

One of his main message was striving for neutrality and finding ‘middle path’.

My energy here is never to shame, but to spread awareness — especially within the singing, ecstatic dance, yoga, meditation, and biohacking circles I’ve been part of. I know many people in these spaces share his views.

So many not even looking/aware of the horrors because they “don’t want to contribute to the energy of fear” by “giving it energy.”

We have to move from abstract goals like praying for “world peace”, to naming specific structures: the Israeli occupation/ apartheid, and western imperialism and military-industrial complex.

If you want to lose weight and get strong, you don’t close your eyes and visualize the pounds falling off.

You pair visualization with hard work and aligned action, like going to gym daily.

In the same way, we have to work to bring about peace and justice. Notice that part inside all of us that is so scared of making a visible stand, even if you feel the calling in your heart.

We CAN change reality, have mass awakening where we understand that we keep cycling through violence because we, as a species, have not collectively set our intention, attention, and aligned action.

(Disclaimer: this episode aired two years ago — he may have shifted his views since.)

I’m so grateful for leaders @gabormatemd, @iceman_hof , who use their platforms to help people think critically about spirituality and activism as one thing.

Curious — who else do you follow in music/yoga/wellness/meditation/ecstaticdance/circles using their platform to spread this of awareness?I’d love to know. by @sahida_apsara

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3 months ago

What if religions saw Eve not as a Temptress, but an Initiator?

A visionary who saw Eden for what it was: a gilded cage designed to keep us submissive. By taking the fruit, she didn’t cause our fall. She led our rise — from passive captivity into active consciousness.

What if religion and pop culture stopped teaching boys to distrust the feminine, and stopped teaching girls to distrust themselves?

What if, when a woman is harmed, our culture stopped asking what she could have done differently, what she wears, who she associates with— and instead centered the conversation back on men mastering non-violence, instead of accepting as fact ‘there will always be violent men’.

Thank you, brother @tarangchawla . Deep gratitude and respect to you for advocating for us and working so hard to shift this culture. I let out a big YESSSS listening to your “Not All Men” post.
As a survivor of domestic violence and childhood SA, I’ve spent years trying to get free and find healing. Connecting with your work added another layer to that healing — knowing there are men out there helping make the world safer for my girls.ps im sorry about what happened to your sis 💔

More power and love to all my sisters, mothers, aunties for the collective strength and inspiration to rise up together! Grateful to all the women who paved the way for our freedom and agency. Q

This track #womenrising produced by @dubfx11 @dubfiles @mistasavona from Infinite Reflection album. by @sahida_apsara

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3 months ago

This is a manufactured war; it’s also a spiritual war. For those of us who are forcing ourselves and choosing to bear witness, we can feel they are flooding our nervous systems with high levels cortisol. They want us anxious and in fight and flight. Our minds were never designed to see little limbs torn apart by bombs, for years on end.

There is a concept in physics and metaphysics called entrainment, where a stronger, more dominant frequency pulls weaker frequencies into alignment with it.

By flooding global consciousness with dense energy of fear, architects of war create a heavy “frequency net.” They gain more power when collective vibration drops into collective helplessness.

Fear and trauma are dense, highly magnetic, contractive energies.

But Revolution require expansive, high-frequency energies - courage, unity, and radical hope.

They are trying to steal our imagination to dream of a brighter different future.

There is a way to be engaged and still protect our mental health. And it’s up to us to see this as a personal journey deeper into our trust and faith in /God/Spiritual Practice/ to lean into, every time we feel shaken.

We keep dreaming of the blossoming of our unified hearts finally grasping that apartheid and occupation overseas directly export the tools of fascism, discrimination and surveillance to our streets.

We visualise everyone seeing that connection and finally coming together as unified whole.

Till we see that reality, we keep finding our people, we celebrate together when we dance and move this energy, to reclaim our life force, to process, to divest to organise together and find solace in each other.

We fiercely guard our mind’s power to imagine past the current horrors, into the kinder world that comes after. Till Palestine/Iran/Sudan/Congo/Myanmar/Haiti/Lebanon/Indigenous folks (and all oppressed peoples) are FREE! Ps and fuckICE!
Thank you @sibilpatri @soumati_studio for our healing chats, thanks to @whattookyousolong for sharing your time and art shooting this 🍉🙏🏾 thanks @dubfx11 @evtweedie @leomarshmusic @astroandtheages @@vocesxpalestinavlc @benimacletambpalestina by @sahida_apsara

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3 months ago

Throwback to @shindigfestival with @dubfx11 and @mr_woodnote.

Morning Visualization #thesystemwillfall #alwayswasalwayswillbeaboriginalland by @sahida_apsara

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3 months ago

//Not Your Expectation// produced by the amazing @dubfiles ft @astroandtheages @steve_allingham_ @evtweedie @leomarshmusic out on all streaming platforms except #fuckspotify. Downlaod song @bandcamp by @sahida_apsara

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3 months ago

Trigger warning

At nine or ten, I was sexually abused by a taxi driver. I sat in back with my mum, but once she fell asleep, he coaxed me to the front. Even before I moved, I felt a knot in my belly. But I’d been raised a people-pleaser, taught to listen to elders — I felt I couldn’t say no.

I don’t blame my parents. People simply didn’t know then what we know now. It’s why I teach my children to trust their instincts, to listen to their body.

I was never taught about consent or body safety. How did he know I wouldn’t scream to wake my mum? My body just froze until it was over. We reached our stop, she paid him, and commented on what a friendly driver he was.

I never told my parents. I was afraid they’d blame me for getting in the front seat.

Another time, alone in a lift — kids walked to the shop alone back then — a man got in and masturbated, staring at me.

More predators could have been caught if children felt safe to report abuse.

I’m not sharing this for shock value, but because I learned young: this world can be dark. Paedophiles live among us and know how to spot vulnerable children. They move through elite circles too — telling how many still deny what the Epstein files reveal about those who run our institutions.

They didn’t protect children, or the sanctity of childhood.

This is systemic- the lack of protection. Children in Gaza, Congo, Sudán, Lebanon, inmigrant kids kidnapped by ICE agents, trafficked in many countries. The UN’s Commission of Inquiry concluding Israeli authorities intentionally targeted Palestinian children — over 20,000 killed.

Even after that. Even after Epstein. People still look away. Deep down, many don’t believe they’re strong-minded enough to hold this darkness and be okay with life — so it feels safer to see paedophilia and evil as abstract, “out there,” instead of a spiritual warfare needing our collective attention.

Acknowledging darkness doesn’t take your light — it’s your light that dispels. What is more clear than the protection of children?

#educateourchildren #protectourchildren #consenteducation #bodysafety by @sahida_apsara

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3 months ago