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Dr Robert Glover | No More Mr. Nice Guy

@drgloverofficial

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Author of No More Mr. Nice Guy.
Stop seeking approval. Start living with integrity.
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Just finished the book No More Mr. Nice Guy by Dr. Robert Glove @drgloverofficial and it was amazing. I highly recommend it for anyone. It really helps create clarity around the types of survival patterns and behaviors many of us learned to feel safe in life, but that are now getting in the way of us building the lives that we want for ourselves.

#nomoremrniceguy #drrobertglover #survival #survivalmechanism #changeyourpatterns

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There’s something that’s stuck with me since TGOM26.

I can’t stop thinking about it.

For the first time since the beginning of this event, since I joined the movement four years ago, there was a sense of wholeness that hadn’t been there before.

A sense that the tree of men’s work finally had the right men in the right places.

All on the same land, all at the same time.

To be truth there’d been a discomfort inside of me that I’ve wrestled with at all the previous TGOMs.

Something wasn’t right. Something was missing.

The Elders of this work and the men ahead of us.

Jacob and I talked about it each year and we knew the thorn was in our side, we just didn’t know how to address it and without them we couldn’t remove it.

But this year was different.

This year the discomfort dissolved and the thorn lost its hold.

The rite order was restored by having multiple generations of men who’ve blazed a trail in men’s work way before Jacob and I were on the scene.

I can’t thank these men enough for their trust, their walk, their expertise and wisdom, the amount they’ve offered and continue to offer to the work, and for their generosity to attend, facilitate, laugh, celebrate and lead at TGOM this year.

Thank you for your lives, brotherhood, leadership, friendship and support @arnerubinstein @drgloverofficial @blasegrinner @coachhola

In so many ways it felt like a completion moment, a beginning, and a continuation.

I know that these men leaning in will only make space for men elders, more men who’ve been carrying the flame of men’s work, and more men who’ve need the work to attend.

Blessings upon blessings brother and thanks upon thanks.

Brotherhood is the medicine.

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I was so blessed at @thegatheringofmen_au to get to spend some time with @drgloverofficial , the author of No more Mr Nice Guy. The book is transformational, the man is inspirational.

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I was so blessed at @thegatheringofmen_au to get to spend some time with @drgloverofficial , the author of No more Mr Nice Guy. The book is transformational, the man is inspirational.

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Six or seven years ago, I came across Dr. Robert Glover’s book “No More Mr. Nice Guy”.

I had no idea how much it would change the way I showed up in my relationships, friendships and work.

Here are three of my biggest takeaways.

1. Being nice isn’t always being kind.

I realised how often I was doing things for my partner with an unspoken expectation of getting something in return.

Glover calls these “covert contracts.”

Rather than understanding and communicating my needs, I was hoping someone else would meet them without me having to ask.

When they didn’t, resentment followed.

I had to learn to communicate my needs, take responsibility for them and give without expecting something in return.

2. Men need other men.

One of the biggest messages in the book is the importance of doing this work alongside other men.

At the time, I didn’t have those men around me.

Looking back, I can see just how much I needed brotherhood, accountability and men who were willing to challenge me rather than simply tell me what I wanted to hear.

It’s a big part of why I do the work I do today.

3. People-pleasing was holding me back professionally.

As a coach, I’ve had to recognise where my desire to be liked was getting in the way of actually helping people.

Avoiding difficult conversations, struggling to set boundaries, not holding clients accountable and even hesitating to sell my services because I feared rejection.

Sometimes, being the nice guy meant doing my clients a disservice.

And it’s something I still have to keep myself accountable for today.

The biggest lesson?

Being a good man and being a nice guy aren’t necessarily the same thing.

You can be kind without being a people-pleaser.

You can care about someone without taking responsibility for their feelings.

And you can be a good man without needing everyone to like you.

If you’re a man who struggles with boundaries, approval-seeking, relationships or speaking up for yourself, I highly recommend reading or listening to “No More Mr. Nice Guy.”

It’s one of the books that helped change the direction of my life.

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@thegatheringofmen_au is making massive positive changes in our communities. It was an honour and a privilege to weave amongst the workshops on the land & provide the soundtrack for the weekend.

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This man’s book was the first real “men’s work” book I ever read.

It didn’t just influence my relationships. It stopped me in my tracks and forced me to look at where my “niceness” wasn’t actually so nice at all. You can find what this means for you if you read “No More Mr. Nice Guy”.

Dr. Robert Glover’s work changed how I related to myself, my partner now and partners of the past, and how I showed up in my work.

Last week, I got to spend time with Rob.

We got coffee, strolled the river, he met my partner (who boiled him eggs and then roused on me for not offering him breakfast earlier 😂), and also shared his time with some close friends of mine.

But there was one moment that stayed with me more than anything whilst we were at @thegatheringofmen_au

Rob said something to me that I heard at the time, but didn’t fully receive.

It wasn’t until I was deep in a breathwork journey run by @johannesegberts that it landed.

I realised I had just received something I’d spent much of my life yearning for from other men.

A blessing.

I once heard @leoncossar say that young men need to be blessed by older men. They yearn to hear, in one form or another:

“I see you. I respect the man you’re becoming. Keep going.”

I don’t believe we should depend on the approval or permission of other men. But there’s something different about receiving acknowledgement from a real elder, a man with years of life, mistakes, relationships, failures and lessons behind him.

I’ve spent much of my life yearning for respect from other men, and I’ve seen how that yearning can express itself negatively.

Competition. Comparison. Proving. Posturing.

Sometimes we’re trying to earn from other men what we’ve never simply been given.

So here’s to our elders. The men whose wisdom wasn’t downloaded from Instagram reels and YouTube videos, but earned through actually living.

It was a privilege to spend time with Rob and witness so many other men doing the work at @thegatheringofmen_au.

Two questions:

Where have you received the blessing of another man and perhaps failed to fully receive it?

And where might there be a younger man or boy still waiting to receive yours?

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A bunch of absolute dawgs on the facilitator lineup for TGOM 2026.
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@blasegrinner leading ⚔️ RITUAL COMBAT ⚔️
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@velancadden guiding 🔥 TEMAZCAL 🔥
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@ryanmoresbywhite leading 💚 HEAL THE BOY 💚
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@tyran.mowbray leading 🪦 DEATH AND DARKNESS 🪦
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@drgloverofficial leading 🫡 NO MORE MR NICE GUY 🫡
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@johannesegberts leading 💨 PRIMORDIAL BREATH 💨
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@ryanbarraclough__ leading 👑 CLAIMING YOUR MANHOOD 👑
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10 days to go til TGOM 2026
2-5 October
Gold Coast Hinterland
160 men | 4 days | 10 powerful processes
Tickets just $1997 (payment plans available)
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Comment TGOM or hit the link in my bio.
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Brotherhood is the medicine. Together we rise.
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Let’s fucking go.

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How do you interpret the Golden Rule? I always interpret it as if I were to be the change I wish to see in the world. To treat others the way I wish to be treated. To lead by example and to always choose character over ego.

There are some, however, who tie a different meaning to the Golden Rule…a “covert contract.” They assume that if they do certain things for you, or act in a certain way, then you will reciprocate in the exact same manner. What they don’t realize is that mindset comes from the ego, not from the heart.

Genuine kindness isn’t a transaction, it’s a reflection. You give because it’s who you are, not because you’re keeping score. When expectations are replaced with authenticity, relationships start to feel lighter, safer, and more genuine.

#comfortcomesaround

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Loved this book. Highly recommend 💯. Just finished it this morning. Onto the next one.
#nomoremrniceguy

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Food poisoning, sirens, indecisiveness will not take me down or stop me from telling you about this event for men coming to Toronto Sept.19th with @drgloverofficial @mankindprojectontario

If you’re a man looking for something new, something else, something that brings you closer, back to you- this is an incredible step in that direction.

All you gotta do is sign up (through Mankind site) dress up (I can help you with that) and show up (fully, vulnerably, as you are) The rest we’ll do it together.

See you then and there.

Love yall.

#manstuff #nomoremisterniceguy #andywilliamsforever

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💛 A boundary can begin with something very small.
A no you finally say.
An evening you protect.
A conversation you choose not to continue.
A relationship where you stop over-giving.
A little more space for yourself.

And, over time, those small choices begin to shape something much bigger.

Your boundaries influence where your energy goes, what you have time for, what you tolerate, who has access to you, and what you can finally give your attention to.

Healthy boundaries aren't about building a life where nobody can reach you.

They're about creating a life where the right things have room to reach you. 🌱

And perhaps that's the beautiful conclusion to this week's journey:

Boundaries don't simply tell the world where you stop.
They help you discover where your life can begin. 🤍

🎯 What would you make more room for if you became more faithful to your own limits? 🌿

#wisdomandresilience4u
#BoundariesCreateSpace #IntentionalLiving #ProtectYourEnergy #LifeWithPurpose

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