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thirty three year oldšŸ‡
no sacrifices for the binary
partner of @z.vallis
@robin_dobbin_t for the music & photos
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I didn’t particularly enjoy releasing our new album.

Over the nine months we spent since our last show: finishing up what we felt was our best ever work, and preparing for it to enter the wider world, I found myself becoming deeply disillusioned with the ā€œindustryā€ side of things (for lack of a better term). The race for hype wore me down, turning my optimism about the music and how it would be understood into pessimism, dogging me in a worsening fashion till halfway through release day.

I know a part of this is just down to my failure to judge things more positively, but I can’t deny the very real exhaustion of putting an immense amount of time, effort and money into something that can be as easily consumed and dismissed by others as a chocolate bar. There’s something nihilistic about the selling of the music that I have found immensely frustrating, especially when sandwiched between the exaggerated (but necessary) emphasis of violent, kinetic language that promises the ā€œheaviest band everā€ to an audience that has a thousand similar artists to choose from. I don’t want to disparage the efforts of those that did that for us, I truly am grateful for them, but I have to acknowledge my perspective on the rat race.

We live in an age of artificiality: pre-packaged reality and social platform-ready emotion with a commercial air. All of it designed to capture and hold our attention. It plays on a lot of volatile emotion, agitating and provoking. And I’m right here, trying not to play the game while saying how I feel, in my own corner.

So I can’t even blame the most cynical of folks turning away from what I’m trying to do with my bandmates in creating music that says, or makes you feel something. But it’s been lonely and difficult in longing for understanding. Playing our release show, as @kierancwhite captured wonderfully here, I finally felt that earnest connection I had been longing for. I experienced it in every fibre of my being, for fifty minutes: a sense that all of this is real, and it matters. But it’s in the room, with you and me.

If you can, please come through to our shows this month. I’m in need to shake your hand. Thanks, love to you all. ā¤ļøā€šŸ”„
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