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I'm brave because my kid deserves someone he can be proud of 🖤 

Everything I now experience is a direct result of what happened the night that Shyam died. All of the new experiences I've had, all of the people I have met, all of the bonds I formed (the ones that lasted as well as the ones that didn't); everything stems from that moment. Cause and effect. And the trauma I experienced also affects every single one of my interactions from that day forward. I'm forever changed. My anxiety. My fears. My PTSD. 

I remember feeling like a part of me died that night too, and I was left grieving the old me as well. My favourite dates in the year became the cause of my worst anxiety attacks and bouts of insomnia. Every single evening, I was exhausted from spending so much energy throughout the day just being 'ok'. But life carried on, and when I looked around me I felt like it was only MY world that had been completely swept from under my feet and I could no longer see anything that remotely resembled my "everyday norm". 

I worked so hard to find little pieces of me that I felt I had lost. I worked so hard to bring back a smile on my face. I worked so damn hard at bringing back some sort of spark in my personality once again. Remembering things like this motivates me today when I find myself struggling with my emotions. If I've done it once before, I can sure as hell do it again.

Last year I experienced a huge pinch me moment. It was the first time I got back on stage to perform which then led on to 2 more live performances later that year at LoveFest by @sunny.lovecoach and I'm so damn proud of myself for fighting through my fears and doing it. 

Fun fact: My old friend @bhavini_jagpal vert kindly sent me two AMAZING backup dancers from her dance company @bespokethecompany....@nxavkaur and @thoughtsbyaaron to support me through the performance. 

The first time we spoke was on a video call, and our first in-person interaction was on the day of the event. Went through the set a couple of times... and then just went for it! I'll always be proud of this moment 🙏🏼
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Major gratitude to @thoughtsbyaaron who just published a glowing review for @rollingstoneuk about the recent @dhrvie show at @xoyoldn, sharing some lovely feedback and giving me a heartfelt shoutout as well, Thanks so much Aaron!😆🙏🏽🩵
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#Rollingstone #UK #Life #Music #London #Thankful #Wow #Blessed #Thankful #Love #Dhruv #Energy #Gratitude #Drummer #Joy #Wild #How #Manifest
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The Bride stole the show - an epic performance by @itsjyoti_ with our 
@bespokethecompany team!

When your Bride Squad is Bespoke - The Company!

#ChikniChameli #BridalDance #SurprisePerformance #BespokeTheCompany #Bespoke #WeddingSurprise #IndianWedding
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