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Vanessa Elle Wilde, The Playologist

@vanessaellewilde

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🍎 Yes, this is my real job. Bringing more play to seriously important things.
↓ Come play

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I woke up this morning with a flutter in my chest and visions of all the things I still want to do. And underneath the flutter, like always, the secret most of us will never say out loud, even to ourselves:
Sometimes we fall in love with the very things that hold us back. And we love them because they hold us back. Some quiet part of us is grateful that we didn't have to step into our greatness. Grateful that something showed up to give us a reason not to.

I call these the noble distractions. The ones dressed in love and family and duty and care. The ones that earn us no judgment, only sympathy. "She had to stay. Her partner needed her. The kids were small. She fell in love." The reasons that make an unlived life look like a sacred one.

We rehearse this story in our movies. The woman one airport away from her dream, the move, the next chapter. And then someone shows up just in time with a confession. She stays. We swoon.
Recently, the man I love asked me a question. "Is your dream more important than me?"

I said yes. Absolutely. Without flinching.

Not because I don't love him. Because love is a yes-and game, not an either-or one. And the woman he loves is feral. Asking me to stay small to keep him would be asking him to love a stranger.

There is a difference between "I loved them, so I didn't do the thing" and "I love myself enough to do the thing."

One is a story about them.

The other is a confession about you.

So if you ever feel the pull to fold the dream into a smaller shape so the love can fit: please, choose to love yourself the absolute mostest.

Eve, somewhere, is chuckling. She did the thing. She took the bite. She is, quite frankly, our girl.

Full essay on the Substack. Link in bio. 🍏 #selflove #eatthefruit #travel #dothething #wildeway by @vanessaellewilde

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5 months ago

WHAT IF FAILURE GOT A ROUND OF APPLAUSE? 👏😂

Vanessa Elle Wilde is a playologist… she teaches play with purpose, applied improv and something she calls Play Intelligence™.

One of her favorite exercises is literally designed around failure.

Why? Because we carry so much shame around getting things wrong. Vanessa turns failure into a game, gets people laughing about it and even has a word they shout when they mess up:
ARUGULA. Yes. Arugula. 😂

Her point is bigger than the game. When we’re fully present and playing, we show up as who we actually are... messy parts included.

3 Minutes. 3 Questions. 3 Crazy Faves.

The Daily Experience joined the Good Ol Gals exhibit at the 2026 BBB Industrious Women’s Summit because GOGs likes to mix things up... and we LOVE showcasing women for the rockstars they are!

CONNECT WITH VANESSA
IG: @vanessaellewilde
https://www.instagram.com/vanessaellewilde/

FB: Vanessa Elle Wilde
https://www.facebook.com/vanessaellewilde/

LinkedIn:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/vanessaellewilde/

GOOD OL GALS
FB: Good Ol Gals
https://www.facebook.com/GoodOlGals/
https://goodolgals.com/

@betterwithbbb

BBB Industrious Women’s Summit Interview 3/11

#TheDailyExperience #GoodOlGals #PlayIntelligence #AppliedImprov #IndustriousWomensSummit #WomenInBusiness taken in San Diego, California by @vanessaellewilde

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a month ago

Had the best time today at the industrious women’s Summit. Thank you, BBB for putting together such an amazing event! @chitownprecious you are amazing 🤩
Great job @vanessaellewilde @therealkathrynenunez by @vanessaellewilde

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2 months ago

How Do You Pull Yourself Out of a Slump?
And nope, a $10 matcha won't work. I tried that.

I keep asking myself this even as I slip more deeply into this cozy dark spot. It’s familiar. I’ve definitely been here before. I know my way out. But sometimes, the weight of sulking actually feels comforting, like a weighted blanket locking you in and down for a deep night’s sleep.

Except, unlike a weighted blanket, this is metaphorical, and the theatrics of the mind and spirit are at play. Like the great ancient tricksters they are, I am here, semi-surrendered to their weight and comfort, knowing full well that I can’t stay here too long, lest I get further lost.

Sometimes not taking any action — whether it’s because you feel paralyzed, overwhelmed, or just plain apathetic — really is the best place to be. I believe it’s good to get to know your own darkness, apathy, limitations, and laziness. Some people call it your shadow. I just call it being human. Nothing fancy, sinister, or even remarkable about it. It’s just the other part of being exuberant. Another facet of expression. A part of the kaleidoscopic self.

As the late great @carolynelliottexistentialkink, author of Existential Kink, advocated — I’m befriending the parts of me that want to do nothing, that want to fall asleep as soon as a challenge arises. Falling in love with my laziness and apathy, and marinating in the pleasure of “I have no idea what to do next.”

Case in point ... Click link in bio for access to the full piece in Substack.
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#existential #iamloved #writing #creativebreakthrough #substack by @vanessaellewilde

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2 months ago

Nothing better than a dance party with hundreds of women at 7pm 🤗
@earlybirds_club taken in Music Box by @vanessaellewilde

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2 months ago

Being out here puts things into perspective. If you let it, it changes your perception of time and your place in its wheel. Whether you want to continue at the rat race speed of things or slow down enough to hear the bird song, to smell the grass, to be buoyant like the tides and the boat ripples and the cooing loons. Cities, big and small are akin to being inside the hive - bustling & fun, but there is good and necessary joy in flying out into the flowers, into sunrises, into the shifting winds. Coming back to the fray with a nervous system synced with nature is a different kind of fullness. #summerdays #wildelife #nervoussystemregulation #treesarelife #lakelife by @vanessaellewilde

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3 months ago

closed the peace ornament shop on etsy a while back. today i’m sitting here unpacking them, holding each one, remembering why i made them in the first place.

so i filmed a little origin story. where the idea came from, what peace actually meant to me when i started making these.

they’ll be back on etsy in limited quantities. if you want to be first to know, dm me “peace” and i’ll add you to the list.

some things are worth bringing back slowly.

#peaceornaments #originstory #etsyshop #slowmaking #comingsoon by @vanessaellewilde

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3 months ago

A few weeks ago, I dreamt my heart lay on a surgical tray beside my liver. Both had become rubbery and dry. The doctor studied them with calm precision, assessing what was left. I always say, "If I can see it, I'll know what to do."

The next day, my dear friend Sita invited me to a cacao heart-healing ceremony.

She gently guided me into my heart, asking only that I be present and listen.

At first, I saw my actual heart. Part of it had collapsed into apathy. It flopped up and down like someone shrugging when they simply don't care anymore.

Then my heart began flopping across the sand, one beat at a time, leaving heart-shaped footsteps behind. The beach became the Camino, except the roads were soft, almost pillowed. I followed winding paths through cathedrals, prayer rocks, villages, mountains, vineyards, sunrises and sunsets.

The message was clear: Follow your heart.

As I walked, another heart appeared. Dark blue. Anatomical. Octopus tentacles hanging beneath it. It dangled from the top of my backpack, still and oxygenless, as though it were dying.

Looking at her filled me with grief and a gratitude.

She had loved so fiercely. She fought the devil for her son. She had carried impossible burdens. She had poured herself into others, grieved love that wasn't returned, and kept giving long after she was empty.

I wanted to save her. Instead, she whispered:

"Let me be."

Everything in me wanted to resuscitate this part of my heart. Instead, I simply walked with her, letting her rest.

The vision shifted to a large canvas covered in deep midnight blues. From its center emerged the same blue heart, brilliant vessels reaching upward, octopus tentacles flowing below. I understood.

She didn't want to be revived. It was time for her to rest.

The canvas would become her resting place. A place to visit her without carrying her.

"You've carried me long enough."

Her final resting place will be completed soon. Stay tuned for A funeral for a heart.
#art #heart #grief #wildelife by @vanessaellewilde

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3 months ago

Hi Friends, I used to host a weekly Heart Meditation, and I truly loved it.

Every week we'd get together in person, get out of our heads, and tune into our hearts. And something really cool happened... because we kept showing up together, the practice actually stuck. It became less about having the discipline to sit still and more about having a place to land each week.

Then... as it does, life happened.

I stopped hosting them and even my own practice took a back seat. I talked with a friend while visiting San Diego, and she told me how much they mattered to her - and if I'd consider offering them again. That's all it took :)

So I'm bringing them back.

Actually... I'm bringing back two different meditation circles. One is co-ed and the other is for women only. They are 30 minutes each because i know ya'll can't sit for longer than that (neither can I!)

If you are interested, comment LOVE and I'll send you the details and link to join. 💛

P.S. Happy #StrawberryMoon #Fullmoon #communityevents by @vanessaellewilde

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4 months ago

Serious question:
Why do we keep expecting one-day protests to create lasting change?

The movements that changed history didn’t stop after the weekend.

Would an “Endless Summer” in DC work? Crazy idea or worth discussing? by @vanessaellewilde

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5 months ago

by @vanessaellewilde

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5 months ago

Stunning new hotel in Coronado. 😍 Day 2!
Still working out some kinks but worth a visit.
TIP: skip reservations and wait for a seat at the bar. taken in The Baby Grand by @vanessaellewilde

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5 months ago