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Amy Stone

@amy_p_stone

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Wife to @natestone84 Mom to đŸ‘§đŸŒđŸ‘§đŸŒđŸ‘ŠđŸŒ
Playing the long game in parenting + life
Co-Founder @seattlecathedral & @spircandleco
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One of our family rules is: If you think something kind, say it out loud. We started practicing this when our oldest daughter was four years old. At first, it was little things: “I like your shirt.” “I like your hat.” “I like your hair.” Because that’s what kids naturally notice first. But over time, as they’ve practiced it more, their compliments have changed too. Now they notice things like: “I love the way you laugh.” Or: “You made everyone feel included.” I think that only happens because they’ve practiced noticing people. It’s vulnerable sometimes. Especially with strangers. There have been moments where our kids worked up the courage to say something kind and the person barely heard them or didn’t react much at all. And honestly, that’s okay too. The goal isn’t perfection. The goal is practice. Because practice doesn’t make perfect — it makes permanent. And over time, we’ve watched our kids become more confident, observant, thoughtful, and brave in the way they move through the world. What makes this story even sweeter is that the girl had actually already been quietly drawing us before my daughter ever walked over to compliment her. The last line in this reel is something we say often in our family: “Our kind thoughts don’t belong to us. They belong to the people we think them about.” So say the nice thing out loud. The world needs it. #Parenting #Kindness #FamilyCulture #RaisingKids #Humanity by @amy_p_stone
At the start of the year, we sat down as a family and each made two lists: More of
 Less of
 What surprised me most wasn’t what we wrote. It was what the kids wrote. More time together. More adventures. More playing, outside time, dance parties, trying new things. Less TV. Less screens. Less stuff to clean up. They’re 6, 8, and 10. And even at that age, they already intuitively know what they really want. They don’t want more things. They want more time with the people they love. Feels like something worth paying attention to. So we’re doing more of those things this year. What a life. #FamilyTime #Parenting #IntentionalLiving #LessScreenTime #MakeMemories by @amy_p_stone
At the start of this year, we tried something simple as a family: One hour. Together. Quiet. We call it “Meditation Monday.” No phones. No TV. No talking. Just a candle lit, music playing, and each of us doing something on our own—reading, coloring, journaling. All together
 but practicing stillness. Honestly, we didn’t think the kids would be into it. Especially our youngest. They love it. And on the nights we skip—because of busy schedules, life, or things not getting done—they’re the ones most disappointed. Somehow, it’s even become motivation. Toys get picked up. Chores get done. Because they don’t want to miss it. What started as something small has become something we really value. A rhythm. A reset. A way to be alone
 without being apart. #FamilyTime #IntentionalLiving #MindfulParenting #SlowDown #EveningRoutine by @amy_p_stone
Road trip thoughts
 We’ve done more road trips this year already than we have in the last few years combined. There are a few reasons for that. First, we decided as a family that we wanted to do more stuff outside this year. More adventures. More exploring. We live in one of the most beautiful places and haven’t done a great job exploring. Second, they’re cheaper. See: the economy. You may have noticed but uh
things are pretty expensive out there and we just can’t afford to fly our family of five all over. Road trips still allow us to achieve the goal—connection, quality time, shared experiences—without breaking the bank. There are also a couple reasons we hadn’t done many road trips before. One, we didn’t think we were an “outdoors family.” (That’s for another reel.) And two, all the girls in our family get BAD motion sickness. Like Dramamine and pressure bracelets help, but someone still might throw up kind of motion sickness. Which means no screens. No books. No coloring. None of whatever it is other kids do to pass the time on road trips. Except fighting. They still have that! But what seemed like an obstacle has become an opportunity. Hours of time together, all in one space. Time to talk. Time to play. Time to be creative. To learn. To share stories. Ask better questions. It’s become my favorite part of the trip. Truly. Oh, and we have to squish all three kids into one row just to fit everything in the car. We literally couldn’t be physically closer together. And somehow, that physical proximity has translated into closer connection, too. The truth is, I’m not always great at being present—even when that’s exactly where I want to be. But the road doesn’t really give me the option not to be. No screens. Few distractions. Nowhere else to go. The only place to be is HERE. #IntentionalParenting #FamilyConnection #FamilyAdventures #ParentingThoughts #RoadTripWithKids by @amy_p_stone
We give our kids autonomy because we want them to become capable adults, not because it’s easier. Honestly, it’s not. We still double-check everything before we walk out the door and have to answer a lot of questions. But somewhere along the way, we started believing kids need to be protected from doing hard things instead of being prepared for them. We think it’s the opposite. The more we hand them real responsibility, even messy, imperfect responsibility, the more they trust themselves to handle it. A packing list feels small. But it’s really an opportunity: I can figure this out. I can contribute. Vacations don’t happen by magic. Someone plans, prepares, and packs. We want our kids to understand that, not just benefit from it. If you want to try this with your own kids, we made the process easy. Comment “TRIP” and we’ll send you an editable copy of the packing lists we use so you can customize them for your own family. What’s one responsibility you could hand your kids this week? #parenting #familyof5 #familytraveltips #intentionalparenting #independentkids by @amy_p_stone
Your kids want to help. I promise you, they do. I think there’s something in each of us that wants to be helpful. To contribute. To play a role in something bigger than ourselves. Being part of a family is our introduction to community. In a world that continues to feel hyper-individualistic, it’s important to remind our kids that they’re part of something larger. They can—and should—help. They’re never too small to add value. Like most things, that desire is either fostered and grows—or it’s stifled and fizzles. We WANT our kids to WANT to help. It might make things take longer in the short run. But in the long run I’m, it teaches them how to participate. How to collaborate. How to share the reward of getting something done together. So next time you’ve got a project, make it a family project. #FamilyPractices #IntentionalParenting #FamilyConnection #ParentingWithPurpose #RaisingGoodHumans So next time you’ve got a project, make it a family affair. by @amy_p_stone
When I was 21, I decided to run a half marathon. This was before Uber, so I called a cab to take me to the starting line a few miles from my apartment. The cab never showed. So I had to sprint just to make it to the race. By the time I got there, I was already exhausted
 and then I had to run 13.1 miles. Sometimes that’s what parenting feels like. Wake up. Get everyone ready. School drop-off. Work. Pickups. Soccer. Gymnastics. T-ball. Then suddenly it’s dinner
 and you have almost nothing left to give. It can be difficult to intentionally connect as a family. That’s why strong families aren’t built on perfect days or complex systems. They’re built on simple, repeatable habits you can return to when life gets busy. We have several, but Rose, Bud, Thorn has become one of our favorites. It’s simple. It takes just a few minutes. But even on the days we’re tired or stressed, it helps us slow down, celebrate the good, process the hard, and stay connected. Every family has a culture. The question is whether we’re building it intentionally. #FamilyPractices #IntentionalParenting #FamilyTraditions #FamilyCulture #Parenting by @amy_p_stone
I’ve always wanted to be a dad. It’s the most meaningful thing I’ve ever done. It’s also the thing that humbles me the most. One of the things I love about fatherhood is that it’s never finished. There’s always another opportunity to listen better. To apologize. To encourage. To show up. It’s never too late to become the dad you want to be. It’s never too late to become the dad you wish you had. I know it’s hard guys. But you’re doing better than ya think. Happy Father’s Day. #FathersDay #Fatherhood #DadLife #Parenting #bestjob by @amy_p_stone
Six weeks ago, we decided to start sharing more of our life online. Not because we have it all figured out. Not because we thought anyone was waiting to hear from us. Mostly because for years people have encouraged us to share some of the things we do as a family, and we finally decided to give it a try. We started with a simple goal: share a few ideas that have shaped our lives and see if they might be useful to someone else. We didn't expect two of our first posts to reach millions of people. But maybe that's because the ideas themselves aren't complicated. Be kind. Be brave. Be present. Invest in people. Most people already know those things matter. The harder question is how you build a life around them. How do you practice kindness? How do you teach courage? How do you create opportunities to be present? How do you make sure the things you value most don't get crowded out by everything else? We've come to believe that the things that matter most deserve a plan. This page is where we'll share some of ours. I know you don't know our kids, but if you did, I think you'd find them kind, confident, and genuinely fun to be around. I know you don't know our marriage, but if you did, I think you'd come away saying, "Those two really love each other." Those same ideas shape how we raise our kids, how we approach marriage and friendship, and how we run SPIR and Cathedral. We certainly don't have life figured out. We're just trying to be intentional about the things that matter most. We're glad you're here. What's one value or practice that has shaped your family? #Parenting #FamilyLife #Marriage #Community #IntentionalLiving #Kindness #PersonalGrowth #FamilyValues by @amy_p_stone
This week was my youngest’s last day of preschool. I asked him how he was feeling. He said: “Happy sad.” I think a lot of parenting feels that way. Happy because they’re growing. Sad because they are. Maybe that’s how many of life’s best moments work. It’s why we use words like “take” and “capture” and “soak up” when we’re in a moment we don’t want to forget. As if we could somehow hold onto it a little longer. But maybe the trick isn’t to capture anything at all. Maybe it’s simply to hold both feelings equally. Happy sad. Forever neighbors. #Parenting #GrowingUp #Family by @amy_p_stone
One of our core family values is bravery. If you ask our kids what they have to be first in order to be brave, they’ll all give the same answer: “A little afraid.” Because being brave isn’t something you are. It’s something you choose. You choose to try. You choose to fail and try again. You choose to show up. You choose to do hard things. You choose to be kind. You choose to help. You choose to care enough to do something when you see someone who needs it. Over the years, we’ve learned that many of the things we hope our kids become are on the other side of those choices. Kindness. Compassion. Resilience. Vulnerability. Helping others. We’re not trying to raise fearless kids. We’re trying to raise kids who understand that fear doesn’t get to make the decision. Courage does. #Courage #Parenting #FamilyValues by @amy_p_stone
One thing I started doing for my wife after we had kids: Instead of trying to find the perfect gift or outfit
 I just buy a bunch of options. She keeps what she likes. I return the rest. The first time I did it was after our first baby when she wanted to get back into working out. I bought a pile of Nike outfits, she picked a couple she felt good in, and I handled the rest. Since then, it’s kind of become our thing. Not because she loves shopping. Honestly, she’s usually too practical to spend money on herself that way. But she told me what she loves most about it is that it gives her a chance to try things she normally wouldn’t buy for herself — things that feel fun, a little different, or make her feel confident and beautiful again outside of just “mom mode.” And the rule is always the same: She should feel absolutely zero pressure to keep any of it. Only the things she genuinely loves and feels good in. I think, at the end of the day, it’s really just a small way of saying: “I still see you.” Husbands and boyfriends — if you want to try something like this but genuinely don’t know where to start, DM me. Happy to help. #Marriage #Motherhood #Relationships #MentalLoad #MothersDay by @amy_p_stone

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