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Nate Stone

@natestone84

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Husband to @amy_p_stone | Dad of 3
Building an intentional family + life
Cofounder @seattlecathedral + @spircandleco
Supporting justice-impacted youth

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One of our family rules is:

If you think something kind, say it out loud.

We started practicing this when our oldest daughter was four years old. At first, it was little things:

“I like your shirt.”
“I like your hat.”
“I like your hair.”

Because that’s what kids naturally notice first.

But over time, as they’ve practiced it more, their compliments have changed too.

Now they notice things like:
“I love the way you laugh.”
Or:
“You made everyone feel included.”

I think that only happens because they’ve practiced noticing people.

It’s vulnerable sometimes. Especially with strangers.

There have been moments where our kids worked up the courage to say something kind and the person barely heard them or didn’t react much at all. And honestly, that’s okay too.

The goal isn’t perfection.
The goal is practice.

Because practice doesn’t make perfect — it makes permanent.

And over time, we’ve watched our kids become more confident, observant, thoughtful, and brave in the way they move through the world.

What makes this story even sweeter is that the girl had actually already been quietly drawing us before my daughter ever walked over to compliment her.

The last line in this reel is something we say often in our family:

“Our kind thoughts don’t belong to us. They belong to the people we think them about.”

So say the nice thing out loud.
The world needs it.

#Parenting #Kindness #FamilyCulture #RaisingKids #Humanity by @natestone84

At the start of this year, we tried something simple as a family:

One hour.
Together.
Quiet.

We call it “Meditation Monday.”

No phones. No TV. No talking.
Just a candle lit, music playing, and each of us doing something on our own—reading, coloring, journaling.

All together… but practicing stillness.

Honestly, we didn’t think the kids would be into it. Especially our youngest.

They love it.

And on the nights we skip—because of busy schedules, life, or things not getting done—they’re the ones most disappointed.

Somehow, it’s even become motivation.
Toys get picked up. Chores get done.
Because they don’t want to miss it.

What started as something small
has become something we really value.

A rhythm.
A reset.
A way to be alone… without being apart.

#FamilyTime #IntentionalLiving #MindfulParenting #SlowDown #EveningRoutine by @natestone84

You look good doing good! 📸❤️

The photos from our second annual Spir Foundation fundraiser are here, and we’ve got the proof that a whole lot of good people had a whole lot of fun!

Huge thanks to everyone who showed up, celebrated, gave generously, and helped make the night so special. And a special shoutout to @truephotographyandvideo for capturing all the joy, connection, and community!

Together, we’ve raised over **$51,000 toward our $60,000 year-end goal!** We’re 85% of the way there, and we’d love your help closing that final gap.

Want to keep the good going? Every gift helps us create more opportunities, support, and belonging for justice-impacted young men.

📸 Check out the full photo gallery and make a gift through the link in our bio!

Thank you for showing up and believing in what’s possible. ❤️

#SpirFoundation #DoingGood #Community #FairChances #Seattle by @natestone84

At the start of the year, we sat down as a family and each made two lists:

More of…
Less of…

What surprised me most wasn’t what we wrote.

It was what the kids wrote.

More time together.
More adventures.
More playing, outside time, dance parties, trying new things.

Less TV.
Less screens.
Less stuff to clean up.

They’re 6, 8, and 10.

And even at that age, they already intuitively know what they really want.

They don’t want more things.
They want more time with the people they love.

Feels like something worth paying attention to. So we’re doing more of those things this year.

What a life.

#FamilyTime #Parenting #IntentionalLiving #LessScreenTime #MakeMemories by @natestone84

Yo! What a night!

Together, we raised over $31,000 at our second annual Spir Foundation fundraiser! We’re incredibly grateful to everyone who showed up, gave generously, volunteered, and helped make the evening so special.

More than anything, we’re grateful for a community that believes in creating opportunities, dignity, and belonging for justice-impacted young men.

Want to be part of what we’re building? There’s still time to give! Every donation helps us get closer to our year-end goal. Link in bio!

Thank you for showing up and believing in what’s possible. by @natestone84

Free Palestine. 🇵🇸

Ed Sheeran seems like a “nice guy.”

The thing about nice guys is that they often masquerade as good ones. They say the right things. They seem innocuous enough. They don’t ruffle feathers. They’re fun at parties. They avoid arguments. Diffuse conflicts. Say things like “let’s catch up soon” and “good to see you.”

The problem is…being nice isn’t enough. The world needs good guys. And to be a good guy, you have to say the thing. Call out the injustice. Confront the bully. Ruffle some feathers. Show up when it’s hard to do so.

I don’t find myself getting frustrated as much these days with “bad guys.” But I am increasingly infuriated by the nice ones. People who calculate their actions based not on what’s right, but on what it costs them to do so. They use words like peacemaker and building bridges as a veneer to hide from acting with conviction.

A while back we launched a candle with 100% of proceeds going towards Gaza relief. I asked a couple of “nice” guys who I know well to share it. Leaders in their communities who have platforms to help if they chose. They both said something to the tune of “let me take a look.” Then ghosted.

Nice guys. But maybe not good ones.

Bad things don’t happen simply because there are bad people doing bad things. They happen when “nice” people do nothing.

We don’t need more nice. We need more good. by @natestone84

I started trying to journal before bed recently. I keep hearing how good it is for your brain, and I gotta say, I do feel better every time I do. If I’m feeling particularly stressed—which is nearly daily, to be honest—I list things I’m grateful for. I can always rattle off a number of things. I have no shortage of things to be grateful for. Some are simple (a roof over my head, the ability to pay our bills), and some are more nuanced (kids I love being around, learning to like and accept myself).

But Amy is almost always the first thing that comes to mind. She is my best friend. The person I trust the most. The person I enjoy the most. The person I want to do mundane tasks with and the person I want to go on adventures with. And everything else I love the most…starts with her.

I love her the way people write about love in books and portray it in our stories. Not perfect, but real. If you’re ever around me, you know it’s true. It might make you roll your eyes, but it is indeed true.

You know that feeling you get when you take a deep, slow inhale and exhale? You can feel your heart rate slow down, your shoulders relax, and your thoughts slow for just a moment. That’s what I feel when I’m with her.

Today is her birthday. She turns 40. We met when she was 23. I knew quickly I’d love her forever. I just had no idea how deeply it’d be. She is the greatest thing to ever happen to me, and when I journal before bed…she’ll be the first thing I think of when I list what I’m grateful for.

Happy birthday, Amy.

Love you forever. by @natestone84

Things My Kids Are Teaching Me

I learn more from parenting than I do almost anything else. It’s so raw and vulnerable that you’re constantly learning about yourself in real time.

This weekend my daughter reminded me of something I’m still learning myself.

It’s so hard for me to accept my imperfections. To stop dwelling on the things I don’t do well. The irony of this video is that I had to record it several times before finally throwing up my hands and saying, “It’ll do.”

There’s so much freedom in creating and letting go. In putting yourself out there and letting the results be the teacher instead of trying to control them. Maybe part of it is accepting that we never had as much control as we thought we did.

I think one of the greatest gifts we can give our kids is freedom from the expectation of perfection. And it’s hard. We’re trying to raise them well, create healthy boundaries, and guide them toward becoming good people. But we’re also trying to teach them to be kind to themselves.

Not because mistakes don’t matter. But because so much of life happens there. It’s where creativity begins, where relationships grow, where humility is formed, and where we learn to apologize, forgive, and try again.

I joke with my kids that Dad is really good at apologizing…because I get so much practice. 😂

We’re not trying to raise kids who never fail. We’re trying to raise kids who know their worth was never dependent on getting everything right.

What’s something you wish someone had taught you about failure or imperfection when you were growing up?

#ThingsMyKidsTeachMe #Parenting #Fatherhood #IntentionalLiving #PersonalGrowth by @natestone84

When I was 21, I decided to run a half marathon.

This was before Uber, so I called a cab to take me to the starting line a few miles from my apartment.

The cab never showed.

So I had to sprint just to make it to the race.

By the time I got there, I was already exhausted… and then I had to run 13.1 miles.

Sometimes that’s what parenting feels like.

Wake up. Get everyone ready. School drop-off. Work. Pickups. Soccer. Gymnastics. T-ball.

Then suddenly it’s dinner… and you have almost nothing left to give.

It can be difficult to intentionally connect as a family.

That’s why strong families aren’t built on perfect days or complex systems. They’re built on simple, repeatable habits you can return to when life gets busy.

We have several, but Rose, Bud, Thorn has become one of our favorites.

It’s simple.

It takes just a few minutes.

But even on the days we’re tired or stressed, it helps us slow down, celebrate the good, process the hard, and stay connected.

Every family has a culture. The question is whether we’re building it intentionally.

#FamilyPractices
#IntentionalParenting
#FamilyTraditions
#FamilyCulture
#Parenting by @natestone84

I don’t talk about this part of my life here nearly enough. I think I need to change that. It’s not that it’s a secret or anything. It’s just easier to post a picture of one of my kids playing soccer than it is to describe what I do.

I work with young men who are nearing the end of their sentences and preparing to return home. They have their whole lives ahead of them, but the paths available to them are full of obstacles. Through SPÍR, we provide paid work, structure, training and a community of people who believe in them. Employment and economic autonomy are essential, but belonging is the deeper goal.

I love this work. I hope I can do it forever.

But the longer I do it, the clearer it becomes: these young men need more than a job.

They need case management. Help building résumés and applying for other jobs. Connections to school. Peer mentors. People who will continue showing up after they return home. A sense of belonging. The list is so long that the challenge isn’t finding ways to help; it’s deciding what to prioritize.

That’s why we started the Spir Foundation.

When the future feels discouraging, it can be tempting to shut down. The antidote to apathy is to show up somewhere that gives you an opportunity to do something with that concern. When you get close to the people most acutely affected by society’s challenges, it becomes nearly impossible not to want to do something.

So I’m asking you to show up with us this Saturday. For them. For me. But also for you.

I think you want to do something positive with your concern for the future. I’m not making an ask so much as inviting you to do what I think you already want to do: be helpful.

My promise is that if you come, you’ll leave feeling encouraged, inspired and more hopeful than when you arrived.

October 3 • 6–9 PM • Tickets at the link in bio. by @natestone84

Road trip thoughts…

We’ve done more road trips this year already than we have in the last few years combined. There are a few reasons for that.

First, we decided as a family that we wanted to do more stuff outside this year. More adventures. More exploring. We live in one of the most beautiful places and haven’t done a great job exploring.

Second, they’re cheaper. See: the economy. You may have noticed but uh…things are pretty expensive out there and we just can’t afford to fly our family of five all over. Road trips still allow us to achieve the goal—connection, quality time, shared experiences—without breaking the bank.

There are also a couple reasons we hadn’t done many road trips before. One, we didn’t think we were an “outdoors family.” (That’s for another reel.) And two, all the girls in our family get BAD motion sickness. Like Dramamine and pressure bracelets help, but someone still might throw up kind of motion sickness.

Which means no screens. No books. No coloring. None of whatever it is other kids do to pass the time on road trips. Except fighting. They still have that! But what seemed like an obstacle has become an opportunity.

Hours of time together, all in one space. Time to talk. Time to play. Time to be creative. To learn. To share stories. Ask better questions.

It’s become my favorite part of the trip. Truly.

Oh, and we have to squish all three kids into one row just to fit everything in the car. We literally couldn’t be physically closer together.

And somehow, that physical proximity has translated into closer connection, too.

The truth is, I’m not always great at being present—even when that’s exactly where I want to be.

But the road doesn’t really give me the option not to be.

No screens. Few distractions. Nowhere else to go.

The only place to be is HERE.

#IntentionalParenting
#FamilyConnection
#FamilyAdventures
#ParentingThoughts
#RoadTripWithKids by @natestone84

Your kids want to help. I promise you, they do.

I think there’s something in each of us that wants to be helpful. To contribute. To play a role in something bigger than ourselves.

Being part of a family is our introduction to community.

In a world that continues to feel hyper-individualistic, it’s important to remind our kids that they’re part of something larger. They can—and should—help. They’re never too small to add value.

Like most things, that desire is either fostered and grows—or it’s stifled and fizzles.

We WANT our kids to WANT to help.

It might make things take longer in the short run. But in the long run I’m, it teaches them how to participate. How to collaborate. How to share the reward of getting something done together.

So next time you’ve got a project, make it a family project.

#FamilyPractices #IntentionalParenting #FamilyConnection #ParentingWithPurpose #RaisingGoodHumans

So next time you’ve got a project, make it a family affair. by @natestone84