The novelist Laleh Khadivi joined @bbcnuala in the Woman’s Hour studio on Tuesday.
During their conversation, Laleh spoke about grief and how she writes about it.
Laleh’s latest book, Female Life on Planet Earth, is about a woman who discovers her late mother had a secret Iranian revolutionary past.
You can listen to the full interview on BBC Sounds - it’s the Woman’s Hour episode from 13 October.
Do Laleh’s words about grief resonate with you? Or do you have a different perspective you’d like to share? 💭
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#grief #bbcwomanshour #womanshour
an hour agoclaybillclay
Just like some others say, haven’t you done with the grieving yet, you’re not being very productive are you?? 😤 as a lot of folk here are saying it’s individual to you and you alone. No one will tell me you should be done grieving by now…37 years with my Ju by my side pretty much every day & you want it done in just 4 seasons….there’s the door
an hour agodelilaaah1
Sometimes I don’t understand everyone’s quick need to explain ‘against’ a post. I listen to what this lady is saying, I take it in, and I think about it. I don’t initially disagree with her, because I’m open to listen/see if anything she says could help me in my grief. I lost my Mom, my beautiful Mom, in July 2023. No one has any idea how some days my grief is still so very heavy. I don’t think she is telling us verbatim how grief is supposed to be. I know that’s what a lot of people heard and felt from what she said. I’m going to listen to her again and see if there is something else I hear. I do know that “it’s common wisdom that it takes four seasons to grieve a person’s death’ is already tossed the hell out, but the idea of having to reinvent myself completely, as a whole different person, rang true. And it’s an idea that may never happen for me. I’m just glad I now know that such a thing does exist bcuz it’s been a sh*tty feeling to navigate.
2 hours agorajshreefaria
I'm wondering which people/culture is this "common wisdom" derived from. This whole narrative about grief, especially the loss of a mother, sounds dismissive, to say the least. If anything, common wisdom suggests that you'll ALWAYS grieve the person who created you/who you depended on for survival.
2 hours agoetherealpollination
10 yrs now. A whole new set of dying hopes realized that she won't experience a beautiful life. That she is missing out on. She could have been a mother, she could have seen a film I know she would have loved, she could have changed other lives... I miss her so much! My baby...
2 hours agonic_mcclure
Nope, there is no timeline in grief, this is reductive and harmful for those trying to make sense of living with their loss …. I think grief experts would argue that this is ‘common wisdom’
2 hours agorootsandwingsburrow
What an insane take. It’s life long and there continuous newness without them.
2 hours agopinknylon
That's not true at all. Every new life experience without them unlocks a new stage of grief, however many years they have been gone.
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